Date: 2012-03-22, 3:01PM EDT
Reply to: your anonymous craigslist address will appear here
Have you ever wanted to be fucked so completely your eyes melted out of your godforsaken face? That's why the Grammyman exists. The Grammyman will fuck anybody, along with his good pal Assplay TheSnowballMaster in the oftentimes clean bathroom on the same floor as our working office in some Times Square fuckhole music studio.
No, your eyes are not lying to you so stop rubbing them like a fucking asshole staring a mirage. I'm sure your eyes will light up like a child the morning of Christmas when you see all the fun things we plan on shoving up your weird body. Febreeze, coffee machines, broken telephones, and even our dicks-- whatever tickles your fancy. Let me assure you, ladies, that an offer this huge only comes around once in a lifetime so act now if you're so inclined. Trust me, you will definitely regret ever contacting me.
